AAAAUGH.
I am in the worst mood ever. If you are just hear to read the A.Y news, go down a few paragraphs, A.Y will be in bold. For those who have an actual interest of my life, continue on.
Okay, so, a few days ago I took my math ISAT. Which I have to get a 238 to pass. I got a 231. And whats worse is that I was really pumped up to pass! I was pissed as shit when I went back to my health class, only to see that there was ANOTHER test I had to take and I wasn't there for the material. So, I just flat-out didn't take it. I B.Sed all the answered and turned it in. I had to take the test outside because by the time I came back everyone had got it done, and was correcting it. So when I came back in, they where still. I made the comment: "Joy, now I get to know every answer I got wrong." Adam, my health teacher said:
"Shesh! Be a little positive."
"Being positive doesn't change a thing!" And soon the whole freaking class got on my ass about being negetive and a pasifist for NOT BEING HAPPY! Oh I'm SOOOOOOOOO sorry I don't see MY life through YOUR eyes! Dear freaking God even Adam doesn't help me. He's the one who STARTS it. So what, I'm not happy for a little while!! Does it matter? You're not human if you say you've never been upset! Damn!
What's worse is that I just got over being different. I decided, hell, its better to be me and have my own induviduality. And for a day,I was ubber happy. I was happy as could be, I could dance!
And now, when I'm myself, EVERYONE WANTS ME TO BE DIFFERENT! Excuse me as I scream for a second.
AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!!
Thank you. I needed that.
Alright seeing as most of you probably didn't even read that, heres the A.Y news, and some info of my new story GoD. For those who read A.Y, please leave comments! I do not just want comments so I have critque and improve. It also shows you're reading the story. So please, COMMENT!! Thank you. As for the GoD story, it'll be posted at random. Its unabreviated form is Goddess of Death. And the abbreviation works, cause it's a story about Gods. Hahaha. Works perfectly. Anyway, it is about the Goddess of death and her iquiry, Shouyoku. I believe she puts a whole new spin-off on death, so even if you're not a religious person, it does have an interesting plot.I think its one of the more complicated story's I've ever made. So I'm quiet proud of it.
For those who have listened to my rant, thank you. For those who read the story news, please take it to heart.
Still waiting for PICTURES,
-Bekko Nisou

I got my Rangers Apprentince book Monday! I finished it Tuesday. It's called "The Siege of Macindaw". I finished it in about 2 hours and thirty minutes. Fast? Well when you wait for nine months for a book to come out you want to read it! It was a very nice book as well. None of the characters pissed me off. So thats all well and good. So this naturaly means I finished Stargirl. I did. Yes, I cried. I always do. So now I'm on Bartimaeus, what else? ^^
What else? What else? Hm... I haven't been feeling my best latley. When school started (August 31st) I got a cold, and then September 1, I got my period. >.< This school year isn't starting out well. But my cold is ending. And my period ended awhile awhile ago. I'm still worried about how my Principle Randy is pushing us. A lot of us are getting nervous already because our EOC testing is coming up at the end of next month... Its crazy. Am I the only one who thinks we're going to fast? Or is it all just me?
I've had some serious lack in insperation. A.Y is becoming a challenge, and I haven't been motivated to make a comic. Everytime I go to make one I look at the blank page and give up before I even get a panel done. I hate it. I want to work, and I usualy have an extremely strong work ethic. But it seems to have dwindled considerably. School work I can do, work I do for my own self-gain, I can't. I don't understand. I have all these things in my head I want to get out, my mind goes insane from it, but my body is too lazy to deal with it... I'm not sure what to do.
I'm also very close to being under-weight. If I lose two pounds I offcialy am. I know it's an easy thing to gain weight... for most people. I rarley ever gain weight. In fact I lose more than I gain. So I'm unsure with what to do. Eat unhealthy and gain bad weight or continue what I'm doing and just keep losing it? Augh.
A.Y obviously is going at a snails pace. I'm on chapter 14 right now. And I'm struggling to get it done. Forgive my terribly slow progess.
Now to explain some of the biggest things that are bothering me.
I am a kind. One of a kind. But I'm unsure if it's good or not. I can't tell if I'm stupid, because I'm not like everyone else. I mean after all, who wants to be with someone who's hurt them so much? It's only natural. Or am I just more sophsitcated than most people and look beyond that one thing? I just don't know.
Already I feel isolated at school. I see everyone else happy with someone... what makes me so different? I hate the way I feel. I used to be a loner who just didn't care about being with anybody. If I wasn't with a Best Beloved, what did I care? I could live. It doesn't matter... and yet now I hate being so lonley. I hate everything that makes me different. I hate these urges I get. I hate being alone at night looking at my ceiling wondering why no one touches me.
Not a pat on the back.
Not a hand-shake.
Not a hug.
I am alone. And I hate every second of it. And what's worse is I know that there's no one out there willing to make me feel better.
Well. See you soon. I guess.
~Bekko Nisou

Covers:

1. ~Redridergirl
2. ~MY-PAGE
3. ~OusamaUrufu
4. ~Excalababe


Coolio Peoples


Coolio Clubs

Was really a camping trip. I just named the trip after one of my favorite classical Pieces, "A Night on Bald Mountain". Very beautiful peice it is.^^
I went camping with my sister and ~MY-PAGE. And it stormed like hell when we where up there. Not when we got there, but when we went to sleep. And it wasn't a bad thing, in fact it was fun. The lightening was beautiful up there. But it was very cold, and I had some big problems sleeping. Espeically with the thunder being so loud and the rain pouring down. I ended up watching Iron Man to help me get to sleep at 2 a.m. But I still didn't get to sleep till about four, and then I woke up at seven. But it was a lot of fun either way, we saw a cool mushroom that looked like a Lemon Meringue Pie. I wanted to eat it... but to no avail. But we did take a picture, I should be getting it soon.
Before the storm, we cooked hotdogs over the fire. So of course we had to make obscene gestures with them. Such as: "Hold my weiner", "Ew, I got weiner juice on me", and of course, "Could you please put your wiener between my buns?". Yeah, we had fun with that. They where tasty after all. Hehehe.
We also went to Idaho City. (I live in Idaho by the way for those who don't know). I bought a freakin' cool insence burner. Its awesome, I burned a bit last night, but ended up putting it out because I couldn't smell it. For I am sick.x.x At first my sister wouldn't let me get the burner. And I wasn't upset that I didn't get what I wanted, it's the fact that I have no money, and then when I finally do have money, she won't let me spend it. Seriously, she get's what she wants when she has money, I should be able to as well. And she thought I was being a selfish bitch. Annoying really.
School started yesterday! I have four classes. English, Health, Child Development, and U.S History. When nine weeks is up, I get another four-period a day sechdule. So every new quarter I get a new schedule. And it kinda sucks cause nine weeks may sound like a lot of time but it's really not. They're really pushing us this year... I have a feeling with so much pressure someone might commit suicide... and it's not like that hasn't happened before.
I went to go say "hello" to John Eric on the first day since I didn't have him in any of my classes. He's my favorite teacher. I came into his room and said: "John Eric! I haven't seen you in so long!"
And he stared at me, for two seconds, with a blank look on his face, before he finally remembered my name. "JULIA!!" He suddenly exclaimed.
Gee, thanks John Eric.x.x
As I said before, I am sick right now. Just as school starts. Joy. And my period just started today. More joy. Aaand, I can finally go off campus during lunch, yet I have no one to drive me anywhere... oooh what a joyous year I am having..x.x And yes, I took my meds, that is why my mood is high.
I am so stuck in A.Y right now. ARRG. I need to think of things, wish me luck with this writers block.
I realized I'm one of a kind! But you'll have to ask me what 'kind' I am.^^
See you all soon.
I'm still waiting for the covers!

1. ~Redridergirl
2. ~MY-PAGE
3. ~OusamaUrufu
4. ~Excalababe

Get them in soon, please!

Working hard
~Bekko Nisou

Coolio Peoples


Coolio Clubs

~Bekko Nisou

Very very very upset. First of all, I got a lot of work done the other night and my computer crashed and nearly erased the whole damn thing! I was going to get chapter 12 done. But no, the computer had other plans evidently. Only half of it got saved, which is good I guess, I don't have to re-type the whole thing. But it's still annoying. Don't expect much work to be put up anything up for a little while. Stupid computer.
But mostly, upset with people. Why the hell do people go up and out of their way to bring up memories that none of us want to remember? You can't move forward by looking into the past damn-it. How stupid.
I feel completely betrayed.
I feel so stupid.
I feel hated.
And I feel heart broken.
So have a good freaking day to you all. Damn it I'm just so done with so many people.

A PREVIEW OF THE NEW A.Y!
But first I have news, be patient please.
As you can see by my mood, my period hit and I'm medication. Blarg. I was in much pain this morning and passed out from the pain. The meds didn't quiet kick in in time. Oh it hurt so bad I was crying.>.< I hate being a woman, men better be thankful they have a penis! Lucky bastards... Of course when my periods over with I will happy to be a woman once more. Or a woman with an inverted penis. (Check last journal if that makes no since to you.)
What else? Hm, I still don't get why Chernabogs a bad guy. I watched Fantasia when I woke up. But while I was sleeping Tom and Jerry was on, I could hear them in my dreams, it was weird. But its better than listening to Bear Grylls. All you hear in your dreams then is: "THERES NO WATER FOR MILES!" And wake up de-hydrated. Its really annoying.
I finished my five Rangers Apprentice Books! Which means I'm ready for the sixth when it comes out on the 31st. Which is when school starts. But I always read "Stargirl" at the beginning of the year. Its my favorite book. I love it more than Bartimaeus, it always makes me cry.x.x
Okay, now for what my fans have been wating for! And I feel special cause I actually have fans! Yay! But here, I'm not gonna say what chapter it is however:
Helene

"What are you doing?" I screamed and lunged forward out of the two guard's grip. "You can't just leave him there! You have to take him back to hell!" I looked up at the older man above me. He turned to see me, for a second his eye's went cold.
"One, all I said is that we'd leave him alone, and we are. Two, we don't have the ability to send him back to hell in the first place. And third, he's a demon dear child. He deserves to die." He sighed and his eyes went soft again. He motioned over to the guards behind me. "Let's go."
"No!" I crawled forward. "You can't just leave him! You can't!"
"Hey, hey now." He bent down next to me and grabbed my left wrist. I slumped to the ground, he got up slowly. I looked at Leon, face first in the dirt. The guard removed his boot from Leon's head, and walked away.
"Leon! Leon please! Wake up!" I pleaded. I felt something cold being rubbed on my wrist. "You have to go back! Please! Wake up! Ah~" I felt a slight pain in my wrist, and my body went weak. My right arm collapsed under my weight. My vision swam and went hazy. Even my head dropped, and I went face first into the dirt.
"It's okay, dear. It's not going to hurt you." I heard him say. "Just relax. Nothing's going to happen. You're safe." I looked up, I could barley see Leon in front of me. His eye's closed as if he was just sleeping. I felt tears swim to my eyes as he got even hazier, and hazier, until my eye-lids finally closed.

* * *

It's cold... more than cold, it's freezing. And the grounds shaking... Where, where am I? I opened my eye's slowly. The moon was still out, but barely. I was in a wooden wagon, being pulled by two horses. I looked to the left of me, it took a second for my vision to become straight, but the man who kidnapped me was outside the wagon walking besides the it. I looked away and cuddled up. The shrill chill in the air was freezing my lungs and heart. But that's fine, I endured the pain. After all... I don't want to exist in a world without Leon. Please, don't die... Please wake up in time. I need you. I breathed in sharply, and coughed. The senior looked over at me shocked. I began to shiver. "Men!" He called. "Quickly! Get the horse blankets! Go now! Before she freezes to death you fools!" Two ran off quickly to another horse-and-wagon behind me. The senior went to the front of the two horses pulling me, making them stop. Then he walked around to the back of my wagon and unlocked the back of it. The two other guards came with thick itchy wool blankets and gave it to the old man. He climbed up on the wagon and closed it back up. He walked over to me slowly and covered me thoroughly. He sat down on the opposite corner of me, his hand in his chin, his eyes soft, and his smile genuine. "Hello dear." He greeted me. "Or should I say Helene?" I looked away from him, he sighed. "I suppose you want to know why we kidnapped you?"


Sound interesting, no? Hehehe.^^ I'm getting chapter ten done right now, once its done the new season begins!
Oh, I'm still waiting for some book covers, I can't wait to see them!

1. ~Redridergirl
2. ~MY-PAGE
3. ~OusamaUrufu
4. ~Excalababe

Get them in soon, please!

Working hard
~Bekko Nisou

Coolio Peoples


Coolio Clubs